15 Apr 2016

What I'm Seeing-I Am Being



I believe that every person alive is awakening to their own Souls purpose in their own way, their own time, at their own pace, to the best of their own ability.  That there is no 'right' or 'wrong' way, that there is simply your way and my way.  Ultimately we can all end up as the same one energy so who cares how or when?  Who am I to judge anyone else or determine what 'stage' they're at as if finding fault with them will make me feel better about my own denial?

I have raged against religion a lot in my life.  I had minimal religion as a child, just enough to rebel against and to awaken my own shadow.  I spent a lot of years after that judging religions and mocking them and the people who follow them.  Oh how I've changed.  I've been hearing quite a few people and seeing quite a few posts lately that are really anti-religion so I looked again at how I am like that in my unconscious mind.  My philosophy now is that if I'm seeing something in the world, I'm being that something in some way.  My ego often wants to stop me owning it, acknowledging it or even being aware of it but it's my new way of life now: what I'm seeing, I am being.  

So I've been looking at how I must still judge religion and I've realised that it was never about religion.  I actually believe that religion is important if applied correctly.  Many people have 'awakened' throughout the ages through their religion.  For me religion is a helpful developmental tool for Souls.  A Soul newly arrived into a physical body is fragile and exposed.  Healthy and nurturing religious support and practice can help this little Soul to learn right from wrong, good from bad, societal expectations and rewards, community, self-discipline, responsibility, self-esteem, boundaries, creativity and much much more. Like all developmental stages though, there comes a time where the practices are so ingrained and feeling so natural and easy that our Soul can call us to grow into something else.  We may be 'called' away from all that we know and love, more than once in order for our Soul to expand and grow spiritually - a natural and necessary progression.

I have found the concept of the Inner Child particularly helpful with this as I see that child as the spark of Divinity within myself.  For me, the Inner Child is my Soul, a little Soul Child within me that needs me to lead her in growing up in this world.  For a long time my Soul was fragmented, I had so totally disowned my Self that like a diamond, I had many facets of personality that formed my ego and, those fragments kept my Soul spark carefully hidden from me until I was really ready to become aware of it in a healthy and safe way.  I was once so brutal with myself that had I gained access sooner, I would have annihilated myself and, I almost did, such was my self hatred.  Through becoming aware of each fragment (mindfulness), I also learned to love and re-parent each of those aspects until I was able to go further in to me.  Last year I knew I was ready to reclaim my Inner Fetus, the tiniest and brightest spark of my Soul that has been waiting to be fully born into this world through me, as me.  I have spent approximately 38 weeks now on spiritual maternity leave and the wait is almost over.  

In a metaphorical way it has been like a real pregnancy.  Already I have felt the life growing inside me.  I have been drawn to nourish my body with only the healthiest foods possible, to avoid chemicals and, my senses have been extremely heightened. A lot of emotions have surfaced for healing and release, energy levels constantly changing and many other symptoms as well.  All of these things happened when I was expecting my 2 kids many years ago and I figure that as I enter motherhood in my own honour,  I might as well get just as excited as I was then.  I never thought I could love anyone as much as my kids but now I know that I can love myself like that too and I finally do.  Now that I can love me like that, I feel that same love for everyone and everything in creation and THAT is a blissful feeling that I'm very grateful for indeed.  Now I can be the love I want to see in the world and that I AM.

I no longer fear religion so I have no further need to judge or blame it and am open to seeing it with love in a fuller context than before.  I need no dogma to grow now as my Spirit knows it's own way home and the fundamentals are already set.  I have borrowed from various belief systems to create my own safe, tailored and successful plan and I hope to always provide a safe energy for others to explore their own way within my presence.  May we all be happy and free to be ourselves.

xxjxx

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening

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