Learning about Soul Reflections and Mirroring has been one of the most amazing and beneficial life tools I've ever come across.  I have been blessed with many tools for healing from trauma but this takes life to a whole new level of bliss for me.  Many modern day guides and teachers speak of it including the late Wayne Dyer, Caroline Myss, Shakti Durga and many other respected and notable world healers.

For me, recognising and acknowledging that everything reflects back to me what my Soul wants me to see and learn has been miraculous to say the least.  It has given me the miracle of forgiveness on a level I never knew existed; a level of gratitude I had previously been unaware of; a level of understanding I had no previous concept of; a capacity for love that I had only ever aspired to believe existed but not fully experienced.

Now, through learning about it first-hand, applying it to my own life and practicing constantly, it is becoming easier to 'flip' everything that arises and love it no matter how it first presents.  To accept that my eyes can only see what I myself am is having a tremendous impact on my ability to connect, empathize and understand and on my capacity for compassion.  I can now love myself unconditionally and so love everything and everyone else without condition too. It's an amazing feeling and life is feeling more and more heavenly every day.

I intuitively created a tool for myself to help me practice.  I have used this tool many times and after having shared it with a few people who got excited about doing the exercise themselves, I thought I'd share it here with you.  

Exercise

When I have a reaction to someone (eg, I feel angry or hurt by someone else):

- I ask God to protect the energy of what I'm about to do so it cannot hurt anyone and to understand that my only intention is to heal me and not to hurt anyone in any way.

- I write a letter to the person telling them exactly how I feel and why.  I get it all out without thinking about how it sounds or how good/bad it is and if I need to swear or be nasty, I do.  

- I then read the letter out loud to myself allowing all of the Emotion to come to life within me so I can release that energy (I usually cry it out because that's who I am). 

- I then cross out the persons name and replace it with my own.  - Then I read it out loud again.  This immediately shows me what ways I am treating myself that I have not yet owned or recognised.  I am then able to see the blessing the other person has brought me and start the process of forgiveness while also forgiving myself for my reactions and patterns surrounding it all too.  Often I'm able to see how other situations in the past have been identical providing an opportunity for healing old traumas too.  

Please know that I have a lived experience of prolonged and at times severe abuse and trauma in childhood and adulthood.  I don't assume your life is easy or that this will work for everyone.  I am simply sharing something that has changed my life and I can only hope that even one other person will find some use for it in their own life.  I pray that person is you.

At+Onement 

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibration #spiritualhealing #forgiveness #heart

Our home

When I tell people that my bedroom is the only indoor room I have I get mixed reactions.  The first one is usually "what do you do when it's cold?"

My response is: "We go inside".  I imagine that other people have as much trouble getting their head around outdoor living as I once did.  My 'outdoor' lifestyle came out of necessity rather than desire but I now love it and am so grateful for the lessons it has brought me, particularly in humility, letting go, creativity and joy.  In my past I would have never dared to believe that I could be happy living the way that I am now, but I am.

My partner and I were offered a small piece of community owned land to build our own house on with the proviso that it was completely removable in case we decided to leave one day.  This way, it would leave no damage if we wanted to take our home with us.  We discussed it at great length for weeks, made lists of pros and cons, researched options, mulled it over and asked more questions before finally deciding to give it a go.  We have not been big on minimalism in the past and might have paused if we had contacted the bank first but during our month of decision making we missed that.  Perhaps we would have made a different choice then so I'm glad myself that we didn't because when we did contact the bank, they would not give us a home loan because it was not our own land.  We were offered a personal loan instead and had the utterly incomprehensible challenge of building a home with a budget of 27 thousand dollars - yep, that's all we could get.  At first I kept saying "how can we do that?"  I said it out loud, over and over and then the ideas began to flow.  

As smokers we were spending probably 95% of our time at home outside then anyway so we decided to let go of needing anything really amazing for the living areas (I have quit smoking since we got here).  We really wanted a big bedroom and bathroom and somewhere undercover to sit outside.  We bought a tent and pitched it on the land as I wanted to wake up to the view each day and ignite my imagination.  I also wanted to connect with the energy of the land and get a feel for how the land 'felt' about us being there.  I felt very strongly that I did not want to barge in and take over the space uninvited.  We lived in the tent for 40 days and in that time we had huge storms fly over, great laughs and lots of ideas.  We ordered a recycled site cabin (6m x 3m) off eBay and decided to move in from the tent the following weekend but the universe seemed to have other ideas.  The very same night the cabin arrived there was a tremendous storm blowing things around everywhere.  At 3am I awoke to my partner telling me to wake up because the tent was tearing apart all around us and he needed my help to move our things.  So at 3am in the middle of a ferocious storm we were throwing clothes and furniture into a cabin high off the ground that we could not yet climb into ourselves and we did it all by torch light!

From that day we began to think outside the square more and eventually we created what we have now, an outdoor home.  Our bedroom is indoors with a commode, walk-in wardrobes and plasma tv, although we have no tv reception.  Our bathroom/laundry/toilet is an aluminum shed (4.5m x 3m).  The shower runs from a garden hose connected to a portable lpg gas hot water system and the washing machine runs off the generator as we have no mains electricity at all. The electric company want between $30-$80k for that and we don't have it.  Eventually we plan to go solar.  With no plumbing and not having $5-&10k for plumbing, we designed our very own composting toilets and have one each.  They are incredible.

Our kitchen, lounge and dining room is all outside on a timber deck with a roof overhead and no walls at all!!! We have running water to the sink tap but have to boil a pot on the bbq for hot water to do dishes.  The bbq is our only stove and I have since adopted an almost entirely sugar-free vegan diet.  For the first 15 months we had no fridge and, within 6 months of building, my pay was cut in half.   I then had to resign from my job there so at first it was hard trying to think of things to eat with no regular income to buy anything.   Now we have gourmet home cooked meals which taste so delicious and once the garden matures we will eat our own produce too.  My partner and I have gotten married since we built our home and my husband still volunteers here, taking care of the community property while I am having to focus on my health fully.  We are fortunate enough to be able to earn money 1-2 days each month but sometimes wonder how we are living off $200 p/wk.  it's hard and I feel afraid sometimes that I will have to give up my studies and go to work before my health allows but then I breathe and remember to just have faith.  That $200 buys our food and fuel and I need to really devote myself to healing right now so I am.  The results of my last medical were the best ever.

If anyone had told me I would ever be living like this, I would have either laughed till I cried or told them it would never happen and yet here we are.  We have one room and none of the 'trappings' and yet, we have fun, connection, laughter, love, joy and each other.  We have breakfast with kangaroos and birds, countless rainbows without the rain, deer regularly grazing nearby, a huge garden on the way and the total silence of nature for miles around.  What more could we possibly want or need?

At+Onement 

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibration #spiritualhealing #vegan #tinyhouse #healthylifestyle #health #nature #earth

As I continue the incredible journey to self-love and Being, I am drawn to reflect on some of the hurdles already crossed in recognition of my own achievements.  As I was unable to acknowledge any of my own achievements for most of my life, this is huge for me in itself.   I believe that one of the biggest hurdles I have crossed is being grounded in my body.  I remember well the first time I was led in a 'Grounding' exercise by a counsellor.  I dutifully began to focus my attention on my feet connecting with the floor and as I moved my attention to my ankles, I experienced a very intense ache in my head and neck which hurt quite a bit.  I realised that I really needed to learn how to 'ground' myself.

Over time I tried many different exercises and at first they brought up old trauma which makes perfect sense to me now but did not at the time.  Our bodies store unresolved trauma in our cells and, in order to heal anything, physical, mental, emotional or spiritual, the cells need to be freed from these burdens.  Bear in mind that the word 'emotion' is like an equation: Emotion = (energy) E+motion (movement).  When energy is in motion in our body, we experience an Emotion.  We can acknowledge this Emotion through recognising, verbalising and validating the feelings.  It is vital though that we then attend to the energy (Emotion).  

I have come to learn that if I do not allow and recognise the energy within my body, I struggle to release it.  It then becomes trapped in my cells and creates dis-harmony and eventually dis-ease.  I have experienced, and now healed many dis-eases in my body including arthritis, cluster headaches, migraine, cancer, hyper- and hypo- thyroidism, depression, anxiety, insomnia, irritable bowel syndrome, back pain and the resulting disability, colds, sinus problems and much more.  My body had an enormous amount of trapped energy and as Peter A Levine suggests in his book Waking The Tiger:Healing Trauma, the trapped energy will use any part of our internal system in order to return to some semblance of normal functioning.  

In order to learn how to release this energy, I first had to learn how to recognise and label my feelings.  I had not 'felt' anything but numb and miserable for so long that I actually had no language for feelings.  I had no real concept of feelings at all and so they all just lumped together inside me until I drowned in them totally and that was when I became suicidal.  I know now that even the suicidal behaviour was just an expression of that trapped Emotion needing release.

As I learned the language I needed for feelings, I began to also learn healthy ways to recognise and release the Emotion too.  Regular massage, acupuncture, hydrotherapy, kinesiology, counseling, psychotherapy, medication and visualisations gave me the knowledge and outlets for gentle releasing.  I also learned some fabulous and safe somatic release exercises at Heal For Life Foundation in NSW, Australia.  During all this I further learned just how separated aka dissociated, I had been from my body, the temple that houses my Soul.  I started to realise just how much damage had occurred and how much of the pain I experienced was directly attributable to this trapped Emotion.  The awareness felt devastating for a while and I found I needed a lot of support while I got through that stage of healing.

This all began about 12 years ago after repeated suicide attempts drove me to do whatever it took to stop the madness.  It ended up taking everything I had and I almost did not survive it but after all that I am still alive and I have to say, feeling grateful to be alive.  About 2 years ago I really started to acknowledge that even with the incredible amount of healing I have done on every level, I was still not fully embodying my Self and not fully recognising the value and vital importance of my body and the role it plays in my life.  I had actually allowed myself to start believing that my body did not really matter after all, that it would eventually stop working and fail me.  This led to me convincing myself that I could and probably should, let go of my attachment to my body now and save myself the trauma of doing that later.  Funnily enough, letting go of attachment to the body is eventually a healthy ideal but, I had never learned to love my body at all and so now I am being led back.  

Last year, I got the sense of reaching a point in my healing where it is time to be 'reborn' into this world wholly and soully, with body, mind and Soul as one.  I set about learning to love and value my body with intent.  I had done loads of work over the previous decade and I'm thankful for that.  I had spent years learning and teaching others the neuroscience behind the ways my body reacts and responds to stimuli and the lack of stimuli.  This really helped to prepare me for the next and so far most important stage, recognising my body as part of me.  It may sound strange but that is really how unattached to my body I once was and for most of my life too.  I had spent decades literally abusing my body and not owning it is a part of who I am - no wonder it created so much dis-ease.  Imagine a child just dumped in the street and stuffed with rubbish and toxins, that's the role my poor body played.  I hated my body and I completely abandoned, neglected and abused it for over 30 years since I left home as a 15 year old.  It was a hard and sad realisation and I'm so glad now that I was able to see that.  My body has survived an incredible amount of abuse and trauma and still allowed me to feel exquisite sensations too.  I need my body and I appreciate what is has done for me.  I also appreciate what it is doing for me and what it will do for me in the future.  I honour the strength, power and value of my body and I believe my body is incredible and amazing.  I love my body, even when it is fat, even when it hurts, even when it is exhausted, even when it is sick, even when it stops working, even when it poops and pees.  I love my body enough to learn how to nurture it and to stop abusing it.  I love my body enough now to change my life for it and I am so very grateful for the opportunities my body has given me.  

In the past year I have honoured my body's needs by saying goodbye to cigarettes, caffeine, sugar, meat and most animal products, most food additives, extreme stress, medications and self-hatred.  I have instead embraced an almost totally sugar-free vegan diet; plenty of fresh, unprocessed produce; gentle movement; mindfulness; meditation; energy healings and study at Shanti Mission in NSW, Australia; living in nature with almost no technology including limited electricity, solar lighting and composting toilets; gardening to grow my own food; downsizing and de-stressing; oil pulling; going barefoot as often as possible; self-expression through writing; positive affirmations; and repeated grounding techniques.  This is all working so well that my body is beginning to love me back and I am able to do some things that I was not able to fit years like vacuum and dance.  I never thought I would be grateful to vacuum a floor but I am now that I am mindful of how much I can do and am honouring that.

Right now I can think of no greater gift I can give myself than to love my body and I do.

At+Onement 

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibration #spiritualhealing

Wow!  Today has brought me a huge blessing already.  During my Ignite Your Spirit healing clinic session today at Shanti Mission Abode of Peace, I was able to fully embody my Inner Child.  While this might sound strange to some, it's amazing for me.  

I have been working with relentless determination for 12 years now to get to this and now I'm here.  'Here' means so much for me now having spent so many years separate from my Self, unable to experience the full feeling of being.  Today I was able to feel that Inner Infant that I value so much now.  I became aware of how much more gently I need to be myself, even to breathe more gently in and out.  To gently BE. To imagine it is an infant set of lungs breathing my breath in and out.  To imagine the little one basking in the Love and Light of my warm and loving heart.  To allow myself to trust and embrace life after so many decades of fearing and rejecting life.

Right now I'm floating on a cloud inside although still very aware of this life around me too.  I'm eating a healthy nourishing snack and then rest to allow the long-buried blissful feelings of infancy to now emerge for the first time.  All I can say right now is wow!  ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

At+Onement 

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibration #spiritualhealing

Today as I wrote in my journal, I thanked myself for getting to today and not giving up.  As I wrote it, I felt doubt and shame because at the ages of 10, 27 and 35, I attempted suicide multiple times and I've always judged myself as having given up.  As I sat with those feelings, this is what I wrote:  

perhaps those were moments where some part of me gave up and another part was created to get me closer to now?  If D.I.D is such an amazing survival strategy to me, how can I not be grateful for the suicide attempts too?  Those attempts ultimately saved me from myself.  If I am honest with myself now, perhaps the attempts were non-lethal anyway?  Considering how much effort I usually put into things, I did not, in hindsight, put as much effort into trying to kill myself as I do into other things.  When I stopped smoking, I practiced, I researched and I got help.  I did everything I could think of to ensure my success.  When I changed to Veganism, the same thing - I researched, I practiced being vegetarian one day a week for 5 years and I have help in the form of friends and a great dietician.  In my faith, I have stretched myself so far that I have let go of everything I used to be through research, practice and support.  When I tried to kill myself though, I did no research to try to find the most effective methods.  I didn't look for other suicidal people to support my death wish.  I did not 'practice' to see what worked for me.  No, I just made the attempts  and then hated myself for surviving because I did not understand then that surviving is my forte.  I survive.  I have survived so much in this life that it is the thing I am most skilled at.  I have survived so many different types and levels of things that I can only wonder in awe at myself today.  I have survived sexual, physical, psychological, emotional, spiritual, educational and medical traumas (including cancer, accidental electrocution and a fatal car crash);  domestic violence, drug and alcohol misuse, self mutilation, bullying, incest,  governmental abuse, isolation, persecution, shaming, humiliation, degradation and more at the hands of others and from myself. I have survived chronic pain, disabilities and cluster headaches and I survived giving up my incredible children in the midst of my pain.

I suspect that those suicide attempts were, as I have thought previously, messages from my Soul to wake up before it was too late.  Messages to save me and not to destroy me.  Those suicide attempts not only saved my life, they changed my life in the most astounding ways possible.  Yes it wreaked havoc, turned my world inside-out and upside-down but my life is now amazingly simple and peaceful, filled with love and daily miracles so I think today, on my beautiful husbands birthday, I will forgive myself for suicidal behaviours in the distant past and love myself for having the courage that brought me through it instead.

At+Onement 

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibtation #spiritualhealing #suicideprevention

#dissociation #did

Coming home to me

I spent most of my life dissociating, living in the past or the future because I didn't feel safe in the now.  My ego could not cope with my circumstances at all so as time went by more and more of the energy of who I was became fragmented, disjointed, disallowed - disassociated.  I remember once telling a counsellor that I felt like an actor playing roles, that there was a different role for me to play with every person I met but if any of them were in a room together I didn't know who to be.  Sad really, that I had learned at such a young age to not be real or present in my own life.  At the same time, what a brilliant coping strategy and, how helpful it is now that I can be present.  With mindfulness, I can step into the energy of others, feel that within myself, then step out again.  It's a very powerful way to develop empathy, compassion and stillness.  When I told that counsellor what I did, I was not feeling brilliant, I was feeling lost.  In the 20 years since, I've worked very hard to not only discover who I am but to BE me as well.  I realise today that it is through love that I have found myself.

My children were the first people that I felt truly safe to be myself with.  Their love for me was so complete, unconditional, accepting and honest and I wanted nothing more right then than to love them too the same way.  Up till then I had tried and tried to love others only to feel devastated and lost.   I didn't know how filled I was with self-hatred then and how unworthy I felt of being loved.  When my children came along, I just wanted to spend every moment caring for them, ensuring they felt all the love I had not felt myself.  I didn't want to miss one moment by remembering the past or daydreaming into the future.  I just drank in every moment with them that I could and committed it to memory.  It's all still there; the way my sons hair shone like strands of spun gold in the sun and the way my daughter beamed with the miracles of each day every morning that she woke up; the smiles, tears, cheers and fears; the music, movies, play and lessons; the discipline, the explanations, the hugs and the stories; cooking and camping together; playing with pets; gardening; boating; celebrations and losses; tragedy and hope.  Loving my children filled every moment and I am so grateful for that experience because one day it was all over.  One day the unhealed lessons from a tragic past tracked me down like bounty hunters and threw me to my face on the ground, clutching at my own soul as I clawed for freedom.  All that I had thought myself to be was an illusion and the mirror suddenly shattered into a thousand pieces.  I began to slowly see how fragmented I was and wondered how I could ever be whole from there.  

Soon after I dared to love another.  It was as if my heart knew that if I could just see how someone else could love me, I would be able to figure out how I could love me too because I still had no idea how to love myself at all.  So began a journey of learning, love, light, discovery and presence.  So began my journey to find out who I am, what I do and don't like, what I do and don't want, what choices I can make, what thoughts and feelings I attach to, what my own experiences have gifted to me.

Last year, after 12 years of really intense work learning to love myself and others equally and unconditionally, I reached a crucible moment where I realised that I still loved others more than myself.  I still believed that I was not as valuable as everyone else and that I still was allowing abuse in my life.  I decided that finally I loved myself enough to be in the present with me too and, just as I had with my children, not want to miss a minute of time with me.  I said no to more abuse and I stopped abusing myself too.  Up till then I was still smoking, eating rubbish and beating up on myself for perceived imperfections and for not being able to meet the impossibly high standards of others who I allowed to manipulate, coerce and even yell at me.  I was allowing the energy of others to create my own energy and, my ego was still trying to create new roles to cope.  So I just said "no more, this time I will be me.  No roles, no hiding, no avoidance or denial.  This time I love myself enough to be real and I will do whatever it takes to keep me safe."

So real is what I am now.  I felt shock, rage, despair, loss, grief, terror, shame, powerlessness, abandonment, hatred, doubt, insanity, confused, betrayed, persecuted, desolate and raw at different times and I was beset by old memories bubbling up and popping into my conscious mind, haunting me with as-yet unfelt feelings but I felt them all.  I stayed right here with myself and I allowed every one of those formerly denied feelings to have its moment within me.  I felt and released the energy of those emotions and I nurtured and thanked myself for doing it every step along the way.  I learned to love myself the way my husband does, the same way I love my children.  I fought for me and I did not give in.  I found my own worth and I am proud of what I have found.  I have willingly walked into the fire and walked out again with my head high and my hand on my heart.  I don't know who I am anymore without those old roles keeping me safe but unreal, but I'm enjoying finding out.  I am enjoying the time I have alone with myself, loving my mind, body and spirit.  I am enjoying the peace and bliss that is part of every day now for me.

I am me and that is enough.  It always was and it always will be.

At+Onement 

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibtation #spiritualhealing

Physiologically wired to judge and blame

If I don't see myself reflected in someone else, it does not necessarily mean they are not being real.  It may also mean that I myself am not being real or that I am unaware of that quality in myself. It is sadly easier for most of us to judge and blame than it is to love and accept, ourselves and others.  The ego is hardwired to judge and blame as a safety mechanism because physically a little region of the brain called the Amygdala essentially runs the show.

The Amygdala activates faster than any other part of our anatomy in order to make sure we survive a threat to our existence.  As the ego believes existence is everything it physically experiences, this can include threat to life, threat to sanity, overwhelming emotions and sensory overloads.  The brain receives information via the senses and if a threat is perceived, the Amygdala starts driving the bus, with most other areas shit down to ensure complete focus on survival only.  This is a fabulous way to ensure our survival. Our secondary organs (i.e., kidneys, pancreas, spleen, etc) are turned of for greater efficiency of the system.  The blood gets pumped only to our major organs and muscles. Our senses become hyper alert and stress how mines are released to prepare the brain and body for the expected harm.  We are flooded with stimulants for improved physical accuracy and strength and opiates for increased endurance.  This means we enter an altered state of reality and feel pain or pleasure differently for a time.  It is a state where digesting food, sleeping, resting, relaxing, thinking and feeling feelings is almost impossible and for some, even speaking may be impossible.  All of this is the brains perfectly natural and instinctual reaction to danger.  It is designed ton preserve is at all costs and for the most part, it works sensationally well.

The Amygdala has no sense of time or space so during danger we will be unable to perceive where we are or how much time is passing.  This is why it can seem like time flies or stands still.  In this altered state of reality, the chemicals cutoff access to my rational, thinking brain donut won't slow me down with thoughts when I need to act, to fight or flee.  Fight and Flight is the only focus right now and the brain ensures it.  If it can do neither in the face of danger, it will put us in a Freeze state instead.  In Freeze, we dissociate completely from the reality in order to survive.  This is the state where we can actually leave our body to float above it, become catatonic, increase the endorphins (opioids), or even enter deaths door.  Freeze is the final gift the brain gives us before we cease to exist according to Peter Levine in his book Waking The Tiger.  We learn to perceive our environment through the Amygdala and it is this that creates the capacity for judgment and blame, aka: always looking for perceived threats.

At+Onement 

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibtation #spiritualhealing

Movement is a privilege

Today I was reminded yet again of the privilege of moving, of having the ability to move; of having a body.  Today I danced without fear, without stimulants, without anxiety, without judgment and without a care.  As I danced I became mindful of how amazing it feels for me to be able to move with that much freedom again.  That mindfulness filled me with joy and gratitude which led to even more expressive movement of my body.  I could not help but beam as I swayed in time to the energy of the beat.

In 2006, at the age of 37, I lost control of my body.  My back, my bladder, my bowels, and my legs all gave up and forced me to rest and become mindful.  I was in constant pain and frightened all the time.  I was depressed, ashamed and almost lost hope.  Specialists wrote me off, one after another and convinced me I had no hope of things improving.  I was put onto a disability pension and sent to hydrotherapy, told not to use gym equipment, not to swim and not to get my hopes too high.  I was told I would never work again and I hated my body for all of this and more.  

One day I decided to dance to a song and my body began to scream in pain almost straight away.  As I explored what feeling the pain was masking, I realised it was fear.  I also realised that even though it hurt, if I danced anyway, at least I could have some joy too.  The pain I felt in my hips turned out to be fear that if someone saw me dancing, they might think I was making it up about my disability and I really wasn't.  I felt ashamed of being disabled and lived in constant fear that other people would shame me too.  It did not happen and I decided that if I WAS going to end up being completely unable to move one day, I would dance at least one more time first.  I did, just one song and then, I sat and rested, took some painkillers, had a snooze and a hot shower and thanked myself for the gift of dancing.  Then I danced for 1 song, once a month, for the next 5 years and today was the culmination of all of those one songs.  Today I remembered with gratitude how afraid I used to be and how blessed I am now to be able to dance to one song, to have control of my bladder and bowel, to be able to vacuum and sweep, to be able to walk.  Being so disabled for 7 years taught me some very important and timely lessons and now, with very little pain and quite a lot of joy, I will dance to one song every time I get the chance and I will love doing it too.

At+Onement 

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibtation #spiritualhealing

My Inner Child 'journey'

I first heard of the concept of the Inner Child in early 2005 from a really great counsellor whim I ended up seeing 5 days a week for 2 years.  I did not understand at all what this Inner Child was it could be for the entire 2 years even though I wanted to.  I settled for believing it was just my memory of me as a child and healed what I could as best I could with the counsellors help.  Sadly though. I couldn't really connect with this 'child', the best I managed was to feel sad that she had been so alone for so long and so miserably sad.  Every memory I had of me as a child, I was crying.  Then I went to a healing program at Heal For Life Foundation in the Hunter Valley in NSW, Australia and I've never looked back!  In the first 5 days I spent there, not only did I make a life-long commitment and connection to my gorgeous Inner Child, I also learned how to parent her.  I ended up spending 10 years there learning all I could and walking alongside others as trey learned too.  It was the most amazing experience I've ever had and I cannot thank them enough for the opportunities I had there.  

For the past 9 months I have taken my re-parenting of myself to a whole new level and devoted all of my time to my inner child, allowing her to live the moments of childhood that were not experienced when I was physically a child.  By doing this, I have found a deep well of unconditional self love inside that is sustaining me through the surfacing of incredibly painful memories that are arising day after day, continuously bubbling up for acknowledgment and closure.  Because of the decade I have spent loving my amazing Inner Child and all of the aspects of myself that she has revealed to me in that time (including the shadows), I am churning through this as of turning straw to gold.  Tonight I begin a retreat to 'Reboot Your Inner Parent at Shanti Missions Abode of Peace in Cooranbong, NSW and I am feeling very excited and grateful for more opportunities to learn how to love my self unconditionally, exactly as I am right now.  Life is such an incredible journey for me after all.

At+Onement 

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibtation #spiritualhealing

Grateful for cluster headaches

Today I went back in time to see my 23 year old self suffering from the torture of cluster headaches.  I felt so much compassion for that poor miserable wretch, hunched over in desolate terror, sobbing with the agony of fighting for 7 years already by then.  She/I had no idea if they would ever end and had given up all hope of ever ever ever feeling any shred of happiness.  She had such love in her heart and was so determined to make the world a better place with that love.  What she didn't know was that she really did have the power to change it.  She kept hearing the nudges to do things differently and she did try, she tried with all the strength she had.  With no support, no information and no hope, she was fighting a battle she thought she would lose but she fought with all she had anyway.  I have never known anyone so brave and so filled with love as she was.  Today I let her go.

I hesitated at first because I know it is me that has been calling out to her across time to keep going, guiding her in her quest for a pain free life.  I realise though that she really is on a heroes journey and of she doesn't do that, I will not be who I am now.  I sent gratitude, forgiveness and love to her as I slowly backed away and cut the etheric ties.  I felt sad but ready and confident all is okay now.  

After that I was hit with the sudden realization that I although I have worked really hard to heal cluster headaches and had got to a place where I had been able to accept them as they are and thank them for teaching me resilience and persistence, how they have helped me become stronger than I ever imagined I could be, I have never considered them to be a blessing until today.  I feel stunned even writing this because I hated and feared cluster headaches for so long and if anyone had told me that this would happen one day I probably would have said something really nasty back.  I hated the headaches and I hated myself for having them.  What I realised today is that is was the self hatred that caused the cluster headaches in the first place.  Those headaches treated me the way I actually believed I deserved to be treated.  This cluster headaches also taught me humility, emotional mastery, transcendence, to control my mind, faith, to teach by example, discernment, to recognise pearls of wisdom and grace, to flow around obstacles, love the unlovable, multi dimensional non-linear reality, service and that there are many paths and levels of truth.  It's actually those clusters that have opened my heart to the capacity I have been able to.  I don't even know if I would be able to love as much as I do now if I had not had cluster headaches torturing me for 6 months of every year from the age of 16-44.  

Three years ago I realised that I needed to make peace with those clusters, that they were a part of who I am and as such, deserved unconditional love too and I struggled.  They brought so much agony and I wanted to die so many times back then but at 44 I was choosing to find any way I could to love them so, I separated from them and saw them as beings in their own right.  This meant I could detach and ponder solutions without the old terror engaging.  I haven't had one since!!  I have now been pain free since October 2013 and I feel ecstatic about that.  I've had the odd 'shadow' here and there but nothing came of it once I employed the technique I know have developed for myself - self love.

Today I was able to totally accept that those clusters were trying to help me learn to rest for the sake of my survival.  I was such a self hating automaton that I flogged myself to the ground all the time, on every level, and then kept flogging.  Those clusters have been the only thing in this life that could ever crush me.  The sad reality is that I needed them and without them I would probably already be dead or in a wheelchair for life because of how hard I pushed myself.  Today I not only forgive cluster headaches and myself for all that lap, today I see the blessing they brought and I am grateful for it.

At+Onement 

#clusterheadaches #love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibtation #spiritualhealing

It's only 9am and I feel blessed already.  I really wanted to attend a workshop this morning that my heart feels very drawn to.  I was feeling anxious that I may not be able to get there due to it starting at 8am and having to travel 30mins to get there and wouldn't you know, my anxiety manifested exactly that.  I woke up at 4:44am and after finally drifting back off to sleep, I then awoke at 7.14 so I almost stayed home.  As I completed my morning ablutions, a whole slew of little light bulbs went off inside and cleared enough energy for me to realise I really did still want to be at the workshop.  I headed off, determined to arrive grounded and unrushed albeit late and on the way I had more light bulbs which made me realise that I've been making choices to keep myself in the dark physically which I know and believe has metaphorical significance.  I also realised this lateness happened so that I can work on loving myself more when I am late and forgiving myself for all the times I've hated on myself and others over lateness.  I now accept that everything happens in Gods time and nothing I do stuffs it up.  This was a perfect example of that for me and I really needed to be late this morning so that I could recognise the shame and fear I had been carrying around lateness and my perception that by being late I was disrespecting everyone.  I know me and I know that I have the utmost respect for all so I have believed a lie.  I now forgive myself from this illusion and set myself free to choose Light again.  What a fabulous day already - I was late and still allowed in and it was as fabulous as I had hoped.  I have also worked out what I can do for the next one to arrive on time, even if I sleep in.  💜💜💜

At+Onement 

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibtation #spiritualhealing

A New Leadership Paradigm

Operating a business is not always easy and many people find it too frustrating or challenging to continue on as owners.  Even employees can struggle with the high demands in business.  One of the biggest and most divisive issues is leadership.  At this time around the world, there is a complete paradigm shift occurring in the management of organizations everywhere.  Many are struggling, even though they may have been successful before.  While the focus has historically been on success, money, egocentricity, top-down authoritarianism and physical existence, there is a huge shift happening now towards more ethical, moral, socially aware, heart-centered, unified, integrated leadership as the world itself moves more markedly in this direction.  One of the biggest issues facing leaders is how to cross the bridge between doing and being; how to walk the talk of the organizations own values and philosophies.  It's quite difficult for older leaders to contemplate and many will make the choice to stay historic.  They will refuse to cross that bridge as it will seem easier to them to do what they have always done.  The trouble is they may not now get what they have always got from this, with more empowered employees who want to live their joy, to find fulfillment in their job, leaders who want to cling to the old way of 'bossing' and 'directing' may very well find that the work environment gets either very stormy or very lonely.  Those employees who don't kick and scream at the seeming heartlessness of their leader will simply leave and find another workplace that meets their needs and over time, the energy of the organization will become so deflated and stagnant that people will stop coming and success will cease to exist, eventually the business will cease to exist too.

Volunteer organizations will have the most noticeable impacts on their businesses and morale because their employees are only there to meet the needs of their own hearts in the first place.  Money is not motivation for volunteers and a leader who won't cross the bridge will struggle to motivate volunteers.  Volunteers will be much more likely to leave fairly quickly if the 'job' doesn't feel right or the organization doesn't uphold its own values and philosophies.

There are some simple ways to create harmony and support your business during these times.  The most important way though is self reflection.  If I own or lead a business, I am the 'brand', I am the publicity, the marketing for the brand.  Who I am and who I be is more likely to affect my business than any other single factor.  Who I am and what my message is will be what people unconsciously and consciously judge.  So it's me I need to shine the spotlight on first if I really care about my business and the people who will ultimately make my business work.

At+Onement 

#business  #leadership #management #heartcentredleadership #love #light  #soul  #mindfulness #healing #trauma #depression 

Energy or Ego States

Eric Berne, who created Transactional Analysis (TA), said that at any given moment, each of us operates from an ego state or energy state and that we can have hundreds if not thousands of these energy states within.  He said that we all have Parent, Child and Adult Ego states.

Over time I have learned that these states can be associated or dissociated, i.e., owned or disowned, accepted or denied by our conscious mind.  That there can be adaptations of each state to get through life with the optimum success within the context of our own experiences.  These adapted parts of ourselves eventually become maladaptive so where they once were helpful, they end up destructive and often addicted too.  There are even theories that personality disorders are manifestations of these ego/energy states and are very manageable over time. Please ensure if you have a diagnosed disorder that you work with your own health professional as it is usually very unsafe trying to do it alone.  

I once identified as having a personality disorder and allowed myself to use antidepressants and therapy to support myself in beginning to address it and heal.  Over a period of 12 years I became aware of 46 very distinct ego states within my psyche and although at first I thought I was a freak and felt terrified that I was probably insane, I came to learn very differently.  Now I see it as such a positive.

It did require an incredible amount of work, tears, loss, pain and sacrifice. It also helped me to learn about energy.  To become aware of each state within me, I had to recognise and acknowledge the energy first.  I had to stop and notice where that energy sat in my body, how it felt, sounded, looked, seemed.  How old I felt in that energy, what feelings I felt in that energy, did that energy have a label or name?  Over time I learned to love each one unconditionally which is amazing for me.  Having once been terrified of anger I now have compassion for it and for people prone to its energy.  All of those different aspects of my ego have taught me so much, particularly to love my self unconditionally.

As tiny children we cannot control whether or not our ego will adapt by disowning pieces of itself or adopting alternate states of being.  If the brain perceives a threat to body or ego, it will do whatever it has to in order to preserve at all costs.  It cannot rationalize or feel feelings in this moment.  There is no empathy or 'other' in this moment, there is only immediate survival.  If these types of situations occur repeatedly before the age of 3 and particularly if the trauma is 'interpersonal' or it is 'betrayal trauma', there is a higher chance the ego will 'split' off and create a new energy state or 'identity' to survive what the core psyche could not.  

Before the age of 3, the ego has not 'grounded' into the brain and so we each absorb the energies of our physical world, particularly strong or important energies in our lives.  This absorption supports the development of our own ego, and is one of the reasons it's vital to monitor and restrict television viewing habits for toddlers, E.g.  If one of the strong energies in our life is unpredictable a lot, our ego will absorb that energy as normal and I will either overtly or covertly adopt that energy too.  This can manifest later as a constant need for chaos as I have absorbed some of the energy of unpredictability and so my brain feels 'safe' with that energy.  Our brains are designed to feel safer with energy it already knows and will recreate the energies it feels safest with in survival situations for years afterwards.

One of the pitfalls of absorbing energy for toddlers is that if it happens often, it becomes 'normal' and over time it may become maladaptive and habitual.  A child may have needed to creat a whole new persona (energy state) to survive being sexually abused by a parent for years but, at 15, 30 or even 70 years of age, the ego may still be creating and/absorbing new energies for less necessary reasons, such as when watching a really sad or very funny movie.  In psychiatric terms this is called 'switching'.  It is simply the ego 'switching' the energy dial to a position the brain (without conscious thought) believes will be better suited to the current moment.

We can address these tendencies by using tools to bring our energy into our conscious awareness which balances out the autonomic nervous system.

In survival, our sympathetic nervous system is activated to ensure we can fight or flight the danger.  Once the danger has passed, the parasympathetic nervous system kicks in so we can rest and digest, repair and maintenance.  The parasympathetic is like the brake on a car.  We need this working well if we want our brain to 'idle' at all, which we do if we want to be healthy and happy.  The most helpful tools for this are meditation, visualisation, grounding, mindfulness, singing, playing a musical instrument, walking, light exercise and sleep.

I now personally have the amazing experience of having 'integrated' my ego so my energy is much more grounded and I'm consciously aware of it.  This has come about through mindfulness, releasing the trapped energy in my body around traumatic memories, meditation, support and self love. I now have one Inner Child that I parent lovingly so I can be an adult in the world.  Thanks Eric Berne for a very helpful and healing breakthrough.

At+Onement

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening #raiseyourvibration #spiritualhealing

Soul reflections for healing

While judgmental thoughts and words can be toxic, unhelpful and can create karmic attraction, like any energy, they also contain positivity but how?  Through mindful awareness of self, knowledge of soul and pure intentions, I can turn my judgments into learning classes for myself.  Accepting that the external world I perceive is reflecting back to me what my soul chooses me to see, my judgments of others can tell me more about who I am in this moment.  As I have become more aware of my own internal reactions to every moment, I have begun to use my judgments as a tool of learning, the hardest part was to stop trying to stop myself from making judgments and to love myself regardless.  

We all judge, it's human nature.  The ego is designed to make judgments so that, as we awaken to the real nature of our being, we can use judgment as a tool for discernment and use it for our highest good and the good of all. Stuck as we are in the lower physical vibration of energy, we can get trapped in those judgments and begin to not only believe in them but feed fear into them as well and blind ourselves to the illusions and deceptions that our judgments can also bring to our awareness.  Neither of these perceptions of judgment is good or bad, it simply is.  All that matters is awareness as this creates the opportunity to reclaim our innate power of being.  Awareness provides choice and therein lies the empowerment.  

As I become more intent on recognising what my judgments tell me about myself, I can let go of the need to control.  I know now that the only thing that can ever be out of control is me.  If I judge something or someone else to be out of control or to need controlling, I can use that to show me where I am lacking or struggling.  I used to judge others so harshly that I feared everyone.  I had no empathy or compassion for anybody at all until I began becoming more aware of myself.  Now I can (and usually do) reflect on those judgments and really see what they were or are still reflecting about my inner self.  For example, I reacted recently to a dear friend avoiding and ignoring me without giving me any reason.  Of course my first reaction was mental, I made a judgment.  This caused a feeling to occur, creating energy to begin its motion within my nervous system in anticipation of the cellular rememberance of why my Soul chose this experience for me again.  All of the experiences we have as adults, we have already experienced before at least once during our childhoods in this life and did not fully transcend so we keep drawing those experiences to guide us forward.  As we grow, we can revisit these to release any trauma the blocked energy created to free our perceptions and rise into higher levels of self-awareness - if we so choose.  These childhood experiences can evoke blame and shame behaviours in us as we become aware of our own shadows peering out at us through the constructs of our thoughts and feelings. Learning to love ourselves through these processes and getting loving support can help a lot and making the intention to one day be able to see the whole thing with love will aid in feeling less guilt and shame later on (because it will happen).

Metaphors exist in all facets of our existence and as we awaken more we see less literally and more metaphorically thereby increasing our ability to see these reflections in every living thing.  Awakening to full consciousness is the journey of the Soul and takes as long as we need it to.  It is not something to control or pressure ourselves with and everyone else is on the same journey, just in their own way and time.  Next time you catch yourself making a judgment just observe it and ask yourself "how am I doing or being that".  It may be that you treat others that way or simply that you treat yourself that way.  For instance my adult self can see that my reaction to the friend who ignored and avoided me showed me I had been treating my own inner child this way again and so feelings of abandonment and worthlessness surfaced and I then attracted that energy in someone outside of me that I love so what I can now see reflecting from that is that my inner child loves me and considers me friend.  That she is feeling abandoned by me and worthless to me as feelings are the child.  I was then able to use this adult information to parent  the child with nurturing. This involved exploring the feelings:  express the feelings so that the alarm in my brain switched off to allow my whole Self to be present and the feelings and thoughts to come fully into my conscious awareness; allowing the energy to come alive in my physical body so I could map the energy, explore past experiences of the same energy, release the energy from my body physically (either with movement or visualization of movement, depending on my body's needs and not my mind's wants);  recognising all of the people and circumstances I have previously held responsible in my blame; then taking my power back by allowing myself to feel and express whatever reactions I've ever had to that energy without aiming it at others (I do this in the bush or in water in total safety after offering the energy to God to contain first so the full intention is healing me and never hurting the energy of others);  I then spend some time 'being' a child (the wonder child who I did not allow myself to be in childhood while I saw everything through fear); I nurture and encourage that child part of me for the help and courage to do this now;  then I flip it all and look at the reflection it has provided and am always provided with a truth that helps me raise my level of consciousness.  It works every time and, I've been doing this for so long now that often, I can go through that entire process within the space of a single moment!

Our brains, bodies, Souls and minds are amazing and incredible and I know for me, I never cease to be astounded and inspired by what life can teach me if I open myself up to the learning.

At+Onement

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening

What I'm Seeing-I Am Being

I believe that every person alive is awakening to their own Souls purpose in their own way, their own time, at their own pace, to the best of their own ability.  That there is no 'right' or 'wrong' way, that there is simply your way and my way.  Ultimately we can all end up as the same one energy so who cares how or when?  Who am I to judge anyone else or determine what 'stage' they're at as if finding fault with them will make me feel better about my own denial?

I have raged against religion a lot in my life.  I had minimal religion as a child, just enough to rebel against and to awaken my own shadow.  I spent a lot of years after that judging religions and mocking them and the people who follow them.  Oh how I've changed.  I've been hearing quite a few people and seeing quite a few posts lately that are really anti-religion so I looked again at how I am like that in my unconscious mind.  My philosophy now is that if I'm seeing something in the world, I'm being that something in some way.  My ego often wants to stop me owning it, acknowledging it or even being aware of it but it's my new way of life now: what I'm seeing, I am being.  

So I've been looking at how I must still judge religion and I've realised that it was never about religion.  I actually believe that religion is important if applied correctly.  Many people have 'awakened' throughout the ages through their religion.  For me religion is a helpful developmental tool for Souls.  A Soul newly arrived into a physical body is fragile and exposed.  Healthy and nurturing religious support and practice can help this little Soul to learn right from wrong, good from bad, societal expectations and rewards, community, self-discipline, responsibility, self-esteem, boundaries, creativity and much much more. Like all developmental stages though, there comes a time where the practices are so ingrained and feeling so natural and easy that our Soul can call us to grow into something else.  We may be 'called' away from all that we know and love, more than once in order for our Soul to expand and grow spiritually - a natural and necessary progression.

I have found the concept of the Inner Child particularly helpful with this as I see that child as the spark of Divinity within myself.  For me, the Inner Child is my Soul, a little Soul Child within me that needs me to lead her in growing up in this world.  For a long time my Soul was fragmented, I had so totally disowned my Self that like a diamond, I had many facets of personality that formed my ego and, those fragments kept my Soul spark carefully hidden from me until I was really ready to become aware of it in a healthy and safe way.  I was once so brutal with myself that had I gained access sooner, I would have annihilated myself and, I almost did, such was my self hatred.  Through becoming aware of each fragment (mindfulness), I also learned to love and re-parent each of those aspects until I was able to go further in to me.  Last year I knew I was ready to reclaim my Inner Fetus, the tiniest and brightest spark of my Soul that has been waiting to be fully born into this world through me, as me.  I have spent approximately 38 weeks now on spiritual maternity leave and the wait is almost over.  

In a metaphorical way it has been like a real pregnancy.  Already I have felt the life growing inside me.  I have been drawn to nourish my body with only the healthiest foods possible, to avoid chemicals and, my senses have been extremely heightened. A lot of emotions have surfaced for healing and release, energy levels constantly changing and many other symptoms as well.  All of these things happened when I was expecting my 2 kids many years ago and I figure that as I enter motherhood in my own honour,  I might as well get just as excited as I was then.  I never thought I could love anyone as much as my kids but now I know that I can love myself like that too and I finally do.  Now that I can love me like that, I feel that same love for everyone and everything in creation and THAT is a blissful feeling that I'm very grateful for indeed.  Now I can be the love I want to see in the world and that I AM.

I no longer fear religion so I have no further need to judge or blame it and am open to seeing it with love in a fuller context than before.  I need no dogma to grow now as my Spirit knows it's own way home and the fundamentals are already set.  I have borrowed from various belief systems to create my own safe, tailored and successful plan and I hope to always provide a safe energy for others to explore their own way within my presence.  May we all be happy and free to be ourselves.

xxjxx

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression #selflove #inspiration #quote #inspiringquotes #spirit #ascension #awakening

Tasting the Divine Light entering my body through a nose parched and dry, the breath infuses my brain with confusion.  Breathe it all in and down, breathe it all up and out.  Just breathe. After confusion comes clarity.  I know that all I need is to observe the confusion.  There is no reason anywhere for me to engage in it and I won't.  "Hello confusion, thank you for showing up today.  I'm aware you're there and I honour your need.  Right now I AM love and you must wait your turn."

As the confusion leaves quietly and respectfully I breathe in more Light and draw it ever further down through my being, out through the soles of my feet and into the earth beneath me.  Breathing still further down I sense Her heart and breathe in time, feeling her essence and mine begin to mingle, a didgeridoo begins playing in my mind caressing my being as my pulse slows and deepens.  I AM the earth, we are as one.  

The Divinity in my breathe ensures I don't get lost as I slowly begin to rise again, breathing up, floating up, drawing back up, through my glorious body to my own welcoming bosom.  I AM home.  I AM my home.

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression

Learning from fear

I'm learning that my fears exist purely to show me mySelf in other people and things.  For example: if I fear that others are afraid of my anger, that fear is to show me that I myself feel afraid of my anger.  Once I take responsibility for my core fear, I will then also begin to open up to see how that impacts on various ways in my life.  It may be that I feel afraid of anger itself and can look at why and how I can learn about ways to positively use anger (creativity, drive, passion, stamina, etc).

Another example is blaming.  If I fear I will be blamed, that is showing me that I myself blame.  Usually it's easier to see outside of ourselves (the world we ARE conscious of) than to see ourselves (what we are generally NOT conscious of).  I know for me, I felt terrified for years of being blamed for everything and over time I came to see that I was the biggest blamer, then I realised that the blame all started and originated from me.  I blamed me.  Because unconsciously I blamed me and wasn't ready to be aware of it, blame was reflecting back to me from others and this fear built up around it as energy to wake me up to it.  It took me a long time to wake up and so the fear energy grew and grew.  Over time I did become aware of my blaming and worked on releasing the energy around the fear and looking at all the different ways I blamed on different levels in different situations.  I healed my fear on many levels but, my Soul knew that deep inside I still blamed mySelf.  I still feared mySelf.  I was still angry at mySelf and so the lessons kept presenting until I HAD to see.  

I learned long ago that the 'dark night of the Soul', 'the black dog', darkness, depression, anxiety, fear, whatever it gets called, is a crucible.  When that darkness first begins to descend around me, I begin to fight.  I begin to struggle, o begin to search for the Light instead.  I've learned that unless I surrender and thank the darkness for the change it is bringing to me, for the opportunity to embrace my own Shadow and love it unconditionally, that darkness will persist.

I learned many years ago to not only surrender but to welcome and embrace my dark night because it only has power when I struggle.  It's only power is through the energy of my own fear and I know that my fear is simply a guide to show me what I need to see on mySelf so, in I go with glee.  In the darkest of that darkness I always find the Light and when I focus on that, the darkness ceases to exist at all.

#love #light #innerchild #soul #angels #mindfulness #gratitude #healing #trauma #depression