When I was expecting my first child my senses became extremely acute.  For the first time in my memory I could smell.  My sense of smell was almost nonexistent until then and it was overwhelming to suddenly have that ability.  It got so that I could smell sugar on a spoon that had been used to stir a cup of tea.  I felt nauseous all the time from being bombarded with what I perceived as sickenly strong aromas.  Sugar, chemicals, perfumes, fuels, plants and everything else became too much to be around.  Once my son was born, it all began to return to normal and once again I had virtually no sense of smell.  Many years later I would learn that trauma had created the lack of sense activation and that it could be healed.

My son is 25 now and during the past year as I've done some major, core healing of infant trauma, my sense of smell (and my other senses) has returned with a vengeance.  It's so overwhelming I even struggle to hug my husband as he smokes and the chemicals on him are overwhelmingly strong to me.  Today I went to a public pool and felt nauseous at the smell of chlorine on my skin afterwards.  I've had to change all soaps and deodorants to avoid the scents and I can no  longer wear perfume or hair products for more than 2 hours at a time without scratching, sneezing or coughing.

I'm actually really grateful for all this because life has not been great without a sense of smell.  While many odours are indeed unpleasant, being unable to smell flowers or babies skin or rain is sad.  I had very little sensation of touch or taste either and, I had relied almost totally on sight, sound and intuition to interpret the world with for almost 1/2 a century.  Having the other senses wake up after all this time has no been easy and has at times been frightening - I can now smell fuel in the air around service stations when they refuel their underground tanks!  Sometimes when I eat a meal now or take a shower I cry at the sheer joy of the experience!  The feeling of warm water on my skin and the explosion of tastes in my food is amazing.  Feeling touch and breezes and the breath in my throat is indescribably beautiful.  Having not had these joys before makes me very aware of them now and I am grateful.  I'm lonely at times because I've been isolated trying to give myself an opportunity to get used to these massive changes.  Sometimes normal sounds pierce my ears with huge vibrations.  It really is like what I imagine newborn babies go through, even light sensitivity and overwhelming emotions.

More and more I believe that there is nothing the body cannot heal with the right amount of self-love, knowledge, support and dedication.  I've been listening solely to my body to make some much needed changes over the past year and I'm really looking forward to reaping these rewards for many years to come.  I have stopped smoking, have an almost totally vegan diet, started meditating daily, learning and practicing regular energy healing, eradicating negativity from my thoughts, found forgiveness for all hurts, am living totally off grid, eliminated all forms of abuse and allowed my faith to guide every day in my life.  Instead of perfectionism, I'm simply asking my body and responding with love and determination and I'm healthier than I've ever been in my whole life.  I have not had a cluster headache in over 2 years and that is one of the most amazing blessings of all.  

So yes I'm grateful and I'm truly thankful for each new moment as it unfolds.

June Parkin