I have made a choice and spoken to my doctor. I feel scared, anxious and excited, all at the same time - I am going to be a non-smoker very soon. My dr agreed to give me Zyban, which I successfully used 10 years ago and I started the course yesterday so hopefully, I quit in 7 more days - yay me!! the tastes of everything are already changing for me (including cigarettes) and I am getting ultra excited at the thought of beating this again. Addiction takes away power and control, addiction is self-abuse, even though it is not entirely conscious and has physical origins. I hate being addicted to anything at all and I have decided that I want my body back!!! Freeing myself from nicotine addiction is the first step I am taking towards getting back a healthy, happy body. one step forward - onwards and upwards!!!!!!!
I had to go off my anti-depressants for a week before I could start the Zyban and I am aware of the problems I may face. I am also aware that I have been irritable (but not too much) and that I need to observe my moods and behaviours for the next couple of months. Last time I quit! I had no concept of how to cope with all of the emotions that quitting brought up. This time, I am well armed. I have had about 1000 hours of counselling over the past 7 years as well as doing 14 self-development courses and training in mental health and trauma informed care, i now instruct others in how to self care and heal themselves. I have never been in a better position to quit! smoking and I really want to do it. I quit! smoking 10 years ago and I thought I would never go back but in 2003, when I had to decide to leave my kids and my marriage, I felt alone and terrified and thought i didn't have anyone to turn to who understood. A small voice in my head (thanks guyz) said that cigarettes had always been there for me and maybe they could help again so i had one, with the intention of smoking till I got through the hell I was in and I swore it was only temporary - and it was - it's 7 years later and the phase has ended. I am sincerely thankful to the cigs for their support but I have to move on and let go and by God, that is exactly what I intend to do - goodbye addiction - it's been a hell of a ride for us both. xoxo
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Well, it's day 7 on the Zyban and so the quit day should/could be tomorrow. I feel excited and I feel anxious and it's okay to feel my feelings, that will help me to quit too! I feel anxious because I'm scared it wont work and I'll be still smoking next week/month/year. I don't want that. I really want my body back, and my feelings, my breath and my lungs. I am praying that this works for me and I am aware that my smoking has trebled in the past week - maybe I'm trying to have as many as possible before I have no more? It seems weird coz the week before, I cut my smoking in half - this past 7 days has more than made up for that. Oh well, onwards and upwards xoxoxoxo
I had to go off my anti-depressants for a week before I could start the Zyban and I am aware of the problems I may face. I am also aware that I have been irritable (but not too much) and that I need to observe my moods and behaviours for the next couple of months. Last time I quit! I had no concept of how to cope with all of the emotions that quitting brought up. This time, I am well armed. I have had about 1000 hours of counselling over the past 7 years as well as doing 14 self-development courses and training in mental health and trauma informed care, i now instruct others in how to self care and heal themselves. I have never been in a better position to quit! smoking and I really want to do it. I quit! smoking 10 years ago and I thought I would never go back but in 2003, when I had to decide to leave my kids and my marriage, I felt alone and terrified and thought i didn't have anyone to turn to who understood. A small voice in my head (thanks guyz) said that cigarettes had always been there for me and maybe they could help again so i had one, with the intention of smoking till I got through the hell I was in and I swore it was only temporary - and it was - it's 7 years later and the phase has ended. I am sincerely thankful to the cigs for their support but I have to move on and let go and by God, that is exactly what I intend to do - goodbye addiction - it's been a hell of a ride for us both. xoxo
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Well, it's day 7 on the Zyban and so the quit day should/could be tomorrow. I feel excited and I feel anxious and it's okay to feel my feelings, that will help me to quit too! I feel anxious because I'm scared it wont work and I'll be still smoking next week/month/year. I don't want that. I really want my body back, and my feelings, my breath and my lungs. I am praying that this works for me and I am aware that my smoking has trebled in the past week - maybe I'm trying to have as many as possible before I have no more? It seems weird coz the week before, I cut my smoking in half - this past 7 days has more than made up for that. Oh well, onwards and upwards xoxoxoxo
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