Once I made the conscious decision to BE unconditional love in all ways at all times, I had a new challenge to accept - loving the unloveable. I was by then happily ensconced in identifying myself as a 'survivor' of child abuse and I believed it was my right and maybe even my duty to hate the 'perpetrators', those whom I felt hurt by. I not only hated them, I hated every perpetrator on the planet and as I did, my list grew. There I was, hating people I had never met, with no evidence of any kind necessary to make 'the list'. Over time, I was able to recognise that statistics show most perpetrators have similar histories to mine and I slowly began to find some compassion but it took a long time. As I learned to love myself more, my heart opened to others too. Where once I had been terrified of people known to me or not, I now became less afraid and curious. Could it really be possible that no one anywhere was trying to hurt me? I was not convinced for a long time. I had told myself for 35 years that everyone was out to hurt me and I was very convincing. Those who loved me were unable to fully penetrate my wall of fear. Even my children, whom I adore, became scary to me for a while as I saw them approach adulthood. They were still gorgeous but because they were becoming adults, I began to fear them too. Thankfully, that was enough to make me want to wake up again. I didn't want to make them responsible for my fears.
Over the years I worked on it and began to feel very safe around people after all. I worked supporting other childhood trauma survivors and really blossomed into Love. I did however, begin to see a real challenge for myself. If I had any chance of BEing unconditional love, it would have to include everything and everyone - I'm not a half-hearted-trying kinda girl. I could not just love some people unconditionally and not others, it's not who I am. I though about it a lot for a few years on and off and eventually embraced it. I want to unconditionally love everything and everyone and I will. It's my goal and I know I can do it. The first step was to give myself permission to hate and forgive myself for hating at all. That shifted the need to hate and it was gone. I then needed to not get caught up in trying to put a SMART timeline to my goal. Reaching my goal in this lifetime would be good but if I have to take it into the next one, so be it. My heart began to expand and I found it easier and easier to have compassion and empathy, for everyone.
That was about 7 years ago and I've gone from strength to strength. I do now love everything and everyone unconditionally and want to support any soul who wants to remember unity: to remember they are Love as I believe we all are. The people I used to hate are in my heart now too. I do not associate with most of them because I no longer need to, my soul has learned what it needed from them. If we were in a room together now, I know I would be safe and so would they. I can pray for them and wish them happiness in their own lives. I like who I am now. Amazingly, I've got to the point where I would love me even if I still hated but I don't still hate and I do love that I can be that person. I have no need to judge others and, having been facing the blackness of my own shadow, would be a hypocrite to judge someone else's blackness. Doing that was never going to make anything right for more than a minute. Judging and blaming myself and others scarred my own heart and it has taken a lot of work to polish it back up again. I'm content loving all now. This Love has changed my life and brought more love to me. It has chased away the hurters and haters and now brought lightworkers to me instead. I'd say that's a pretty good reward and I'm happy with who I am too which is even better.
I have called back all the hateful energy I sent out into the world as words, thoughts and actions and asked that it be transmuted into unconditional love. I accept whatever I reap from it and give thanks for more lessons. I acknowledge the hurt I myself have caused and ask forgiveness from that too. I choose today to let it all go and step into the power of this moment, of being a BEing of Love and I cast off the shackles of fear that are no longer mine to wear. I bless and love all of creation, no matter what, and I accept the continuing help that this amazing universe will provide in recognising any un-love still within me.
https://www.facebook.com/RememberingUnity/posts/1057782897631077:0
RememberingUnity
fb.me/RememberingUnity
lokah samasta sukhino bhavantu
#innerchild #mindfulness #prayer #inspiration #quote #vibration #inspiringquotes #followforfollow #ascension #awakening #light #selflove #raiseyourvibration #unity #spiritualhealing #soul #gratitude #neuroscienceinaction #love #unityconsciousness #life #healing #tothineownselfbetrue #positivevibes #mythoughts #energy #peaceonearth #remembering
No comments:
Post a Comment