Moving house

I decree today to be a day of rest for me.  I've been flat out for the past two weeks while moving house.  While falling into bed exhausted every night my self care has been healthy, lusciously fresh meals; prayer mixed with affirmations, reflecting, and salt baths.  Today is a stop-and-rest day so I can regain some energy and spend some quality time with my wonderful husband while he recovers his own energy.  I used to really hate moving house.  I don't know how many times I moved as a child, I lost count at 20 times.  After I left home I moved about a dozen times before buying my own home.  4 years later it was sold and I bought another one which was home for me for ten years before I gave it away and moved again.  Since then I've moved 14 times and even lived in my car.  I had come to really hate moving house.  I realised a while ago that I needed to love the experience and I think I'm getting there.

About 2 years ago I was given the opportunity to build my own home and I decided to say yes.  I'd reached a point where I believed I'd found my calling and my tribe, my 'home' in this life and I was very happy to put down roots.  On every level I felt at home within and without and it brought me great joy to allow myself the dream of having my own home again too.  Little did I know that I was about to move again and if I had known beforehand, perhaps I would have not chosen the experiences I've had in that time.  I've come to realise that no matter the motivator, fear or love, every choice is still perfect, every experience provides growth towards the Light.  It's the acceptance or rejection of myself that changes my perceptions of it all and my attachments to whatever outcome unfolds.  This time, I caught myself saying that I hate moving house and realised that I need to embrace the experience and discover joy in it if I want to find peace in it.  Choosing to look at that opened up dozens of opportunities to reflect on my thoughts and feelings around moving house.  I've delved into my past moves with the intent of using them as reference points and tools rather than to relive them at all.   Exploring what lessons if any, came from each move and what patterns have existed has proven quite revealing and worthwhile to me.  These have shown me a path to navigate through this move and allowed me to clear out old debris from along that path also.  

One of the things that stands out the most for me is my attachments.  Each time I moved house I collected more things.  My husband and I both have consciously let go of a lot of stuff over the past few moves and been increasingly aware of our old patterns of holding on to things that don't matter at all.  This time we've both decided to have a major clean out on every level and it feels very liberating for me.  I'm done dragging the past around with me into every new moment and I am now embracing the gifts that I find in the present moment.  I don't need things to embrace that, I just need love and gratitude in my heart and I have plenty of those.

The other thing that has really stood out for me is impermanence.  No thing lasts forever and I'm letting go of the illusion of that too.  In each moment I see a death and rebirth of every conceivable thing so permanence only lasts for that one moment in time.  Accepting this has brought me more peace and created an opening within me for moe love.  I can feel my energy contracting and expanding just thinking about it and it's a lovely awareness.  The thought of moving house now reminds me of a souls choice to enter into a new school and how many opportunities are born from that choice.  I'll never look at moving house the same way as I used to and I have now found plenty to be joyous about so I'm grateful and looking forward to my day of rest.

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