Reality is subjective and the mind struggles to see past its own experiences so that it can expand, grow, learn and surrender.  Neuroscience and physics are quickly proving that whatever our brain believes is real IS real for our brain.  When we attach to the e-motion/s elicited by our beliefs, it's impossible for reason to engage, for rational thought to occur.  Pushing down these feelings or numbing ourselves to them makes it worse, just another form of attachment because we are telling ourselves they are real too.  I'm finding that allowing these energies to flow through me as breath and watching them teach me about myself is magical, healing and liberating.  

I remember about eight years ago having an experience of extreme bliss and understanding.  For about five minutes, I felt as though I understood everything and everyone everywhere and, as I gasped in awe I also recognised that it could not possibly last.  I felt the true power of that moment and just knew it was not possible for me to sustain it as I was.  I surrendered to the joy in the moment knowing it would soon end and allowed myself to focus on having the moment at all.  I also knew that this moment would sustain me many times into the future, like a light leading me home.

That was a subjective experience that I chose to have.  My mind could have believed anything it wanted to about that moment.  I chose love because my heart had opened enough to do that.  Since then I have consciously practiced choosing love in as many situations as I can.  I chose to believe that by 'practising' to choose love, I would be able to create new neural maps in my brain.  Once the heart opens and love becomes the instinctual choice (through repetitive 'practice') life takes on a whole new dimension.  I cannot describe anymore the heights I've reached through practising love in the lows.  My latest opportunity to practice this is through learning self-love and it has proven as subjective as anything else.  Dictionary.com defines 'subjective' as: "existing in the mind; belonging to the thinking subject rather than to the object of thought."  Self love is the newest joy that my mind is applying to my experiences and I can see why I was unready before now.  The first few months were far beyond anything I would have previously thought possible and I feel blessed to have learned in my life what I have up to that point so I could get myself through it.  Using my signature "4 elements to heal", I was able to rise to Remembering Unity and still I rise.  

I AM all things and yet no thing and although my fears buffet me in disbelief from time to time, I choose love.  I surrender my previous paranoias, conspiracy theories, doubts, fears and the ego that created them all, to embrace the Divine 'is-ness' of existence.  As my mind believes that my heart beats within my chest, so I use those beats to lead me home, to breathe into any existence I choose. I choose love and as I journey on I will learn to love every single moment knowing that there is only one moment anyway - an existential Groundhog Day that exists as bliss for my Soul.  The subjective beliefs I choose to have can cloud my vision or enhance it and once again: I choose Love.

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ॐ ॐ ॐॐ ॐ ॐ

lokah samasta sukhino bhavantu

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